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| Form your own path or follow other ones |
As I drove to school today I did not want listen to any of the podcasts I downloaded on my ipod because I needed to be able to turn all my focus on the art of contemplation. The night before I stayed up until midnight dabbling online about future adventures I could take and it left me in an impatient state of mind. Inspiration struck and I wanted to go on a trip right that moment with school having the potential of becoming a very distant memory. Fast forward three days later and I'm sitting here 1040pm Sunday night with an exam in morning wishing that I was done with school. Listening to nostalgic Coldplay songs I think about the potential of the time that is currently occupied. Right at this moment I could be planning a backcountry trek through the Colorado Plateau in Utah via the Hayduke Trail. Alas, that is not the case. There is only this life; the odds of me sitting, breathing, thinking at this moment is beyond my understanding. So what the f*** am I doing here sitting in a goddamned chair in front of a computer. The answer is that I am realist. What I do understand is why I delved into the field of PT. I can say with full authenticity that I very much like physical therapy and I can't imagine another field of academia I could be in. The complexity of movement and it's practical and functional application. However, the original intention was simply to provide a means for me to have a good trade, modest income, job security, and the certitude of having time for myself; whether it be for backpacking, thinking, playing, running, or anything! This is what I truly value in the highest order. So these 3 years in grad school (now 1.75 left) is the price I pay for a lifetime of the above things. Not a bad investment. (I should also mention that there were the undergrad studies I endured since 2006). I will be 29 years old when I finally have my license and the first thing I am going to do is backpack the 800 mile Hayduke, Fall 2012. Then it will hit me that I am finally free of academia and can live my life and do what I truly want to do. Travel and experience life. I can understand that career oriented people will delve into their profession, get credentials, earn higher degrees, participate in research etc; and I know I can have that kind of drive for that type of career. However, what is sacrificed is time and that is not something I will give up. It's too precious, too valuable, too important. Don't get me wrong, I plan on becoming a good therapist but I don't see myself dedicating myself to the degree of complete immersion. I will have my head out of the water looking for adventures and opportunities. What is life about really? I interpret it simply as living it; experiencing this globe and the nature that bore us.
Word. I've been thinking about how I'd really like to just work part time as an adjunct professor so I could really have summers off to go hike instead of having to do research. I'd probably be more able to swing that around here in the bay area--so many schools within an hour that I could teach 3 classes at a time if I felt like it/needed money, or go hiking if I didn't feel like it. I think it might be a good idea to try a full-time position first, however to pay off debts and build up a little savings.
ReplyDeleteI completely agree with you. I am dreaming of that day. Let the countdown begin.
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